S3E40
· 32:52
Hey, y'all. Welcome to the Working Mama's podcast, season 3 of the Working Mama's podcast make no error. I am your host, Nikki Winston. So excited to be back on the mic for a new season, for a couple of reasons. 1st, I have a new microphone.
Nikki Winston, CPA:So I'm like brand new brand new out here. And this is my first episode using this microphone that I got a couple months ago, because I had planned on recording episodes a couple months ago. But shit got real, things got in the way. Life was happening, and that did not happen. So I'm glad to be on the mic, on the new mic.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And I got this microphone because back in season 2, probably season 1 and season 2, I was telling y'all about how my son had broke the charger to the other microphone that I was using. And when he broke it the second time, I took that as a sign that I just needed to go get a new mic. So I was actually going to go out and get this other mic that I had in mind, and then I saw that somebody had posted about this, new mic that I had. This is is a Samsung q two u microphone. It's pretty dope too.
Nikki Winston, CPA:I really like it. So I am sure that the audio quality is dope. I mean, I started my podcast using my beats, And then and then I went to the other microphone. I won't even say the brand because it's like the super basic podcast microphone that all the newbies, all the new podcasters get. But I'm glad to to be speaking and finally using this microphone.
Nikki Winston, CPA:But I got my water with me, of course. I hope y'all got y'all drink too. I just finished my lemon turmeric tea that I made earlier. I put some ginger in it. I put some honey in it.
Nikki Winston, CPA:It was banging. I actually want some more, but it's 2:30 in the morning. So I'm a stick with my my tea, because I do not feel or with my water, because I do not feel like going back downstairs. But I hope y'all are doing well. I hope everybody's good and safe and happy, and I wanna talk today about embracing discomfort, this episode.
Nikki Winston, CPA:Before I do, I just wanna say that I literally had a brain fart. But guess what? I'm keeping that in the episode. This is an unedited life that I'm living over here, so that's how we gonna do that. But I wanna talk today about embracing discomfort.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And with the last, at this point, year and some change that we've been dealing with this COVID 19 pandemic, I feel like we have all felt some discomfort to some degree that we've never felt before, and that wasn't on our list. That wasn't expected. And so even though it might not always feel good in many respects, there's so much to be learned and embraced in moments of discomfort. We consume ourselves with the finish line without even enjoying the race, and there's just so much beauty in that race. Even though it might not be sexy, it might not be fun, it might not feel good, and the discomfort might last longer than you wanted it to last, but there is a lot to be learned about yourself, about who you are as a person when you are placed in situations of discomfort.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And we're so obsessed with getting it done, that we miss all of the growth, all of the learnings, all the mistakes, all the small wins. And that's why people end up making the same mistakes twice. You start a business, for example, It fails, and then you turn around and start another business with the exact same blueprint. Then that business fails because you didn't learn the first time about the importance of filing your sales tax returns on time, about actually forming a separate entity, whether it's an LLC, a corporation, a partnership, whatever. You didn't learn the first time about hiring the wrong people, about not having repeatable processes in place, about not having a CPA to help you navigate through the early stages.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And that's really just from a work perspective. But when you talk about that home and the discomfort, your home is supposed to be a place of, at least from my perspective, tranquility, peace, calm, solitude, somewhere where you can, you know, literally let your hair down. Walk in the door, throw the bra across the room. And just trying to keep everything together at the house can be discomfort. And if you don't have somebody to talk to, somebody to really help you release that stress, it can be difficult.
Nikki Winston, CPA:So I personally have felt a lot of discomfort the last really, I I've always there's always been some element of discomfort, but I really felt a lot of elements dis of discomfort in the last year or so just because of some moves that I made that didn't always feel good, but they were necessary. And even with work, I had made a decision to leave my job because it wasn't worth the stress that it was causing. And I felt like I was always just a 100 miles and running. I could never catch up. I could never get to where I needed to be because I was constantly having to stop and go back and fix stuff that was wrong, that has been wrong for years that, you know, never got addressed, never was corrected.
Nikki Winston, CPA:CPA. We talking numbers. The ROI wasn't worth it. I I'm I'm a CPA. We talk in numbers.
Nikki Winston, CPA:The ROI wasn't worth it. The cost benefit analysis was just like, no. We're not doing this. And so I spent a couple months trying to figure out what I wanted to do. Is this the right decision?
Nikki Winston, CPA:Is this what I'm gonna do? And I got to a point one day where I said, yes. This is the right decision. I'm not going to second guess myself. Anytime I have not trusted my gut, I have ended up in a fucked up place.
Nikki Winston, CPA:So I'm trusting my gut, and I am having to deal with every day the stresses of this job, the toxicity of the culture, and just the dumbass people who just don't wanna do the work. And I say that because I felt like everything was just so overly complicated because nobody wanted to do the work. And it's one thing to have something that you need to work on, that you need to fix, whether it be a project, a process, whatever. But when you realize the work needs to be done and you're still not willing to do it, it's like, I ain't got time for this. I'm not about to wake up and be mad kicking and screaming because I gotta go into this this office that has burnt me completely out.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And so I said, you know what? It's time for me to go. I am walking away from this job, and I don't have another one lined up. But I have my businesses, not even a but, but I have my businesses. So it's not like I'm not gonna have any income or anything like that, but I really took this job with the intention of affecting some change and and making it better, and this environment doesn't fit my ambitions.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And so I have to go. So that was that was uncomfortable. That was uncomfortable, and I was just like, look. This is my opportunity to fully bet on me. And I started going hard in my business.
Nikki Winston, CPA:Like, I'm just going focus on my businesses full time, and it paid off. I actually had a lot of people reaching out to me. I felt like I was just gonna have to put all these posts on social media and start reaching out to people and cold calling and hand saying, hey. I'm doing this and doing that. And I didn't have to do that.
Nikki Winston, CPA:The people found me. Whether it was somebody who was like, hey. Can you I wanna apply for the PPP loan. Can you help me submit my application? Or somebody looking for help with the CPA exam.
Nikki Winston, CPA:Or people reaching out to me like, hey. I saw your blog post about, what was it? Filing filing small business taxes for the first time. And then they asked me, can you create some content for me? I have these topics that I really wanna focus on.
Nikki Winston, CPA:Can you create some posts for me? So I ended up securing all of these clients during a time where I was still sitting there like, okay. What am I gonna do? What is my strategy gonna be? How am I gonna get clients?
Nikki Winston, CPA:And they ended up finding me. So in the midst of all that because I wasn't sure what I was gonna do. So before I even went hard in my business, I had sat down and made a list of what I needed out of my next job. Like, okay. I I'm about to leave this job.
Nikki Winston, CPA:I don't wanna go from one bad company to another. Or I'm not gonna say bad company. That that no. I'm not gonna say bad company. I'm not going to go from one company that I'm not a fit for to another company that I'm not a fit for.
Nikki Winston, CPA:So I made a list of what I wanted, what I needed, what I was willing to budge on, was that what I was not willing to budge on. And I was applying for a couple jobs, but then I said, I'm not even doing that. I'm not even applying for no jobs. My next job will find me. And even then, in order for me to consider a job because at this point, I'm like, it's it's it's it's full time it's entrepreneur time.
Nikki Winston, CPA:It's full time entrepreneur. So maybe my next job will find me, but in the meantime, I'm gonna do me and focus on my CPA exam coaching programs and continuing to build out the foundation for my CPA firm. And lo and behold, one day I get the email. And or no. Not before I even got there, before I even got to the email, I had got a message on LinkedIn about an opportunity and, you know, exchanged messages, had a couple phone calls, and then the communication stopped.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And it was from a recruiter at my current company. Then the communication stopped. I'm like, damn. What happened? Okay.
Nikki Winston, CPA:But then the following day, I get an email from a recruiter. Same company. Different role. She had no idea that this other recruiter had reached out to me a few days before. And so she sent me a email.
Nikki Winston, CPA:I thought it was spam. Like, I wasn't really taking this serious because I was like, I just talked to somebody from here, and he kinda ghosted me. So I'm not sure what's going on here. I'm not even sure how they found me. Maybe that wasn't even real.
Nikki Winston, CPA:Like, maybe this is a spam message or something. So I ignored it. And then couple days later, she followed up. Hey. I just wanna make sure you got this message.
Nikki Winston, CPA:Are you interested? This, that, and the other. And it was a recruiter from Microsoft. And so here I am, full fledged entrepreneur, building things up, working with my clients and everybody, and I'm like, okay. Any other company, I probably would have been like, probably wouldn't have responded, but this is Microsoft.
Nikki Winston, CPA:I have to have this conversation. So had a conversation, moved on in the process, had a couple more conversations, moved on in the process. Fast forward, now I'm the senior finance controller for the Xbox and Surface portfolios at Microsoft. And going through that experience is now let me just say let me just reiterate. This is an unedited podcast, And I started this podcast to be my whole entire self.
Nikki Winston, CPA:So that's why I don't record my episode and go back and edit and go back and take out the silent part or the umms or none of that. This I started my podcast as a cathartic exercise for me, and I love to talk about things that I'm passionate about. Sometimes I have show notes, sometimes I don't. And, in this case, I don't have show notes for this. So this is literally coming off the dome.
Nikki Winston, CPA:I have show notes for this episode, but I totally went off on a tangent. And if you have been listening to the Working Mama's podcast, you know that a tangent is almost always gonna happen. So I I wasn't even planning on talking about this, and I don't have any notes. But this was just such a pivotal moment of personal growth for me that I have to share it because I experienced all of this during some of the most uncomfortable moments. And to be the controller now be a controller now at Microsoft after I left the working environment that I was in, after I said I was done with the the mediocre not mediocre.
Nikki Winston, CPA:That's a bad word. After I said I was done with taking jobs that didn't suit me, that didn't fulfill me. After I made this list where I drew a piece of where I drew a line down a piece of paper and rolled out all these things that I wanted and needed and was gonna was willing to deal with and not willing to deal with. And to now have this offer in my hand that checked off every box and then some and to be found. I wasn't checking for Microsoft.
Nikki Winston, CPA:I didn't apply. They found me. I deeply appreciate that. And this this new opportunity was the reassurance for me that it doesn't matter how uncomfortable the situation is. It doesn't matter how bleak or how grim a situation may look.
Nikki Winston, CPA:It doesn't matter how uncertain a situation may look. You never know who's watching you. You never know what opportunity is on the other side of the door. And Microsoft found me at a time when I was doing me, and I was clear on what my next move needed to be in my career if I decided to stay on the corporate track. So Microsoft literally made me a offer that I could not refuse, and it's been, what, 4 months, 5 months now.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And I I love every moment of it, even the uncomfortable ones. I made a huge mistake the other day, and it's crazy because I knew I knew it was wrong, but I still ended up doing it because I was so scatterbrained. It was so much going on, and I was upset about it. And I I beat myself up about it for a minute. But I was like, you know what?
Nikki Winston, CPA:I'm a human being. I'm a person. I made a mistake. So guess what I'm gonna do instead of running and hiding under a rock? I'm gonna send the email to acknowledge my mistake to my stakeholders, and I'm going to outline the mistake, how the mistake happened, the actions that I took to fix it, and what I'm doing going forward to avoid that mistake.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And in doing that, the responses I got back were just so full of love. No problem, Nicole. It's all good. We're all learning something. And that was another moment of discomfort because when I realized I made the mistake, I'm like, oh my god.
Nikki Winston, CPA:How did I do this? And it wasn't just with 1 person with a whole email string of people. Like, how did I do this? How did I mess this up? So it was it was it was a quick moment of discomfort because I knew what I needed to do to fix it, to make it right.
Nikki Winston, CPA:But at the same time, just knowing that you have to take this time and explain your mistake and acknowledge it, that can be uncomfortable. But whatever your struggle is, whatever you are fearing right now, Lean into that and address it. Tackle it head on because it might not be as bad as you think that it is. And, honestly, you should be doing some things that make you uncomfortable. Your job, your business, your workouts should make you uncomfortable.
Nikki Winston, CPA:Because if it doesn't, you're not growing. And I I used to hear people say that, I'm maintaining. No. You're not. You're either growing or you're declining.
Nikki Winston, CPA:You're not maintaining. And if you are maintaining, that's not a good thing. So stop saying that and and putting a ribbon on it like it's something to be celebrated. Your job should make you uncomfortable. You're getting a steady paycheck unlike many entrepreneurs.
Nikki Winston, CPA:But, you know, decisions are being made about your future that you might not even be a part of. When you'll get promoted, where your name is on the layoff list, All of that can be effective immediately. Most employees who get laid off don't know that they're about to get laid off. Now getting fired is something different because as somebody who has been hired a bunch of times, I've hired a bunch of people. I've also fired peep well, I'm not gonna say that.
Nikki Winston, CPA:I'll say I've I fired people for context, but the reality is these people fired themselves. Because all of the people that I have had to terminate should have known that it was coming because I had given them ample opportunity for corrective action. So your job should make you uncomfortable. You should be going in there, giving it your all. And being a learner, being a beginner, that's another moment of discomfort.
Nikki Winston, CPA:When I tell y'all that the show notes that I wrote for this episode called Embracing Discomfort, I'm not even looking at them no more. Is is crazy. But another moment of discomfort was being new to Microsoft. Even though I'm a seasoned accountant, I'm a CPA, I have all this domain expertise, I had to be a beginner. I had to go back to being a beginner to say I have to look at accounting and finance and budgeting and planning and analysis from Microsoft's perspective.
Nikki Winston, CPA:But in addition to that, I have to learn the company. I have to learn about this new environment that I'm in. I have to learn about my stakeholders. I have to learn about the monthly operating rhythm and the meeting cadence and all these other deliverables and such. So first few weeks on the job was tough because I literally felt like somebody who had just graduated from college and I was trying to transition from the collegiate life to professional life.
Nikki Winston, CPA:I had to go back to square 1 and say, forget about what I did at my last job or the job before that or the job before that. Forget about all these other things. I have to take a step back and be a beginner. So I was working a lot of hours in the beginning because I was working my normal hours, but I had to put in some late nights to do my own research, to look people up, to see who they were, to see what their expectations were, to sit back and ingest all of the notes I had taken from all the meetings I had been in that day to go through my inbox and say, what's going on in my inbox that I need to be aware of, that I need to take action on? Let me explore these websites and learn about the company and learn about my products.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And that was uncomfortable. It was really uncomfortable because I was so impatient. Like, look. I just wanna know this right now. I wanna know everything right now.
Nikki Winston, CPA:And having to ask for help, that wasn't uncomfortable for me because I'm that person, like, look. I will ask you a 1,000 and one questions, and you can turn your head and whisper and say I'm annoying or I ask too many questions or whatever, but at least I will walk away with the information I need to do what I need to do. So whatever your discomfort is, in light of COVID, I know there's been a lot of uncertainty, and people are losing jobs or unemployment is running out. People are getting sick. Kids are going through things and trying to make sense of this whole social distancing thing.
Nikki Winston, CPA:You've been locked in the house with people that you've probably seen a new side of that you haven't seen before, or maybe you've seen it before, and now being around them a lot more has exacerbated some things. So there could be all kind of transitions that create this discomfort at work, at home, in your relationships, not being able to see people, not being able to hang out with people. A lot of the normalcy is gone. But I wanna go back to what I said earlier is being uncomfortable is not always a bad thing. There are some beautiful things that come out of being uncomfortable.
Nikki Winston, CPA:Don't even get me started on talking about the CPA exam, and how uncomfortable that was to have to pass 4 exams, but I took 13 exams to pass 4. So don't don't even talk about the discomfort of sending my kids back to school because they were getting too comfortable with digital learning, and I didn't want them to miss a beat. I needed them to maintain some rigor and some structure, And I sent them back to school not knowing how it was gonna go, as far as how how they were gonna feel, and how they were gonna adjust to maybe seeing some of their friends at school, but seeing their classmates on the video or seeing their teacher with a mask on. So you never really get to see the teacher's whole face or know the teacher because all you see are their eyes. The discomfort of jumping off the porch.
Nikki Winston, CPA:I'm done with this job. The discomfort of let me focus on doing better for me, the discomfort of trying to abide by my anti inflammatory diet when everybody in my house likes gummies and juice and cookies and all of the things that I was trying to avoid or move away from or stay away from. So discomfort hits us on all sides. Running the business, not knowing if you're gonna have to close the doors tomorrow. Just so many.
Nikki Winston, CPA:It hits us from all sides, but the takeaway is embrace it. Don't run away from it. Run towards it. Because I promise you that you will emerge from whatever your discomfort is as a much better person. So I'm at 30 minutes of literally just freestyling this episode.
Nikki Winston, CPA:So I'll take that to mean that talking about discomfort from this perspective was on my heart and needed to be said. So if you're listening to this and you can relate, let me know. Hit me up on Instagram at nickwinstoncpa. You can go to my website, nickwinston.cpa. That dotcpa domain hits different.
Nikki Winston, CPA:No. My website was nickwinstoncpa.com, but now it's nickwinstondot cpa. Another benefit of being a certified public accountant for the CPA candidates who are listening. But let me know what y'all been up to and what you think and what your morning. So I'm a be done.
Nikki Winston, CPA:It's 308 in the morning, and I said I was going to bed at 3:30. But, I know some of y'all are like, what were you talking about? Yes. I'm going to bed at 3:30. No matter what time I go to bed, I get my 8 hours of sleep.
Nikki Winston, CPA:So when I wake up tomorrow, it'd be, like, 11:30, 12 o'clock because I need my 8 hours. But that's all a part of me living my life according to what works for me and not what somebody thinks. So y'all be good. I will talk to y'all soon. Thank you for tuning in.
Nikki Winston, CPA:Feel free to subscribe. Tell your friends about it. Use the hashtag working mamas, w e r k I n m o m m a s, and tag me at nickwinstoncpa when you listen. I will talk to y'all soon. Bye.
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